I started out a long time ago trying to prove that aspergers was just the hottest new diagnosis everyone had. i did not what to believe that it was real and that there are truly was this thing called aspergers. I have always considered myself a skeptic of everything and everyone. unfortunately there came a time when i could no long pretend it was not real, yeah there are those dumb asses on the web who " self diagnosed" themselves, just cause they don't want to get off the computer and do something. why would i want to prove that there was no such thing as aspergers? well i have two sons Austin and Jacob, my 13yr Austin has always been just him that is how i always describe him to people. he never was the social sort in fact he hates anything to do with it to the point at this time i am writing this i can name off on one hand the places he will leave the house to go to. there is also the other issues some of them i blame myself for. i am not what you call a organize punctual person, i am the one you tell to come at 5pm when the party really starts at 6pm and maybe i will be there by 7pm. i have extras of everything cause i always set thing down and lose them to the point that i no longer carry a purse cause i have lost so many. i love to travel i have been all across this country doing odd jobs even when the boys were young and still for a time tried to travel with them. my oldest on the other hand is a by the book child if you say you are making mac and cheese that means you are making Kraft shells and cheese it can be no other brand or shape and not the low fat 2% either anything else is not mac and cheese to him. he can spend hours setting up his little green army men in his room and not have to take a break. if you say we will leave at 7:50am for school there is no walking out the door at 7:48 or 7:52 it has to be 7:50 am. there are other issues of course alot of other issues. my youngest is alot like me loves to travel has never met a stranger and would lose his head if it were not tied down.
so anyways what was i saying is did not want to believe that the reason my oldest son flaps his arms like he is going to fly away when he gets excited is because he is aspergers. I don't know the right word to use i can not say that we ( as in me and the school) did not always know something was Wrong cause there is nothing wrong with him, but i can say we always thought he was odd and special. he has always been in a special ed class for lots of different reasons one of them being he potty trained very late in life and even now if not remind will forget to use the toilet when he is so focused on something the world does not exist. on top of all that he is very particular about the toilet he will use there are only 3 in this world i know of that he will use at any given time. he is not what you call a touchy feelly child in fact a hug from him is so rare that when they do happen I'm shocked.
My youngest who is 11yrs old, i am luck to have him not to say I'm am not lucky to have Austin, but having Jacob makes things easier. he is a very cuddly child to this day even though he is about my height will still try to sit in my lap. has no problem hugging me in public but above all else i treasure in him is his devotion to his bother. about a year ago their "father" ( i use that term loosely) showed up after being gone for over a year and wanted custody of them. (something about having a new girlfriend that was better then me I'm told) i sat down and talked with Jacob and asked him what he really wanted. he looked at me and said mom i love you and don't want to leave you but i have to go where my brother goes cause he is my brother and he needs me. i had to look in straight in the face and tell him i understood. what i wanted to do was say no that's not right then run and hide like a big baby. turns out it all worked out in the end courts would not even grant him visits outside of the county and i got child support which i had not been getting at all and he has not been back for about a year. that is why i am so proud of Jacob that's not to say there are not times when i could hang him out the window by his toes trust me there are times.
OK a little about me I am a single mom with a dead beat soon to be ex husband but i have been saying that for years just never got around to finishing that divorce I've started it many times it just never seems to get done, things come up or i run out of money. last i heard he is many states away in California but who knows and who cares. I am a nurse i love nursing been doing it now for about 4 years and wish i had done it sooner. I have just the two boys well that's if you don't count my baby Darwin Eugene who is a mini jack Russell terrier and his daughter queen trouble yes that is her name and that's what she is( she is the queen of the house and requires that everyone know this). and of course to be fair to them 4 red ear turtles and a bunch i mean a bunch of guppies. no i did not mean to have guppies they were supposed to be dinner for the turtles but since i cant seem to speak turtle they did not know this and now i have a whole tank full. OK enough for now i must find my bed.
